i'm so paranoid about whether or not he's going to develop properly... look at Us, we turned out fine. We work with what we've got.

From 7am until 1pm my mind was on a loop:
We just woke up and youre already rubbimg your eyes. Do you need to sleep? you need to sleep. But you can't yet. you're so awake... wanna eat? no? a little? ok. shit i shouldnt have let you. ok i wont until closer to 10. Then you can eat and then sleep.
and so it goes....

finally i exhaust myself, and give up, and THEN he tells me, so clearly communicated. Eat. Nowww!~ gobble gobbble, burp, a little bit of rocking. then, Zzzzz.

Stop being paranoid. He'll sleep when he wants to sleep. just have fun with him until he makes an alternative wish known. Even though he doesnt use words like i'm so bent on ("i'm looking forward to him being 3... or 18.") his communcative style can teach me so much.

Be more present... er, i mean, be present.


in other news, i have an appointment for him (us) at the acupuncturist on the 3rd. I'm getting a holistic care kit for around $100 that contains over 300 remedies and should last for his entire childhood. She''s treated pertussis a bunch, for adults, chldren and infants.